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by ssilkenwolvess



Category: Pokemon Mystery Dungeon
Genre: Emotional Hurt/Comfort, F/F, Fluff and Angst, Hurt/Comfort, POV Second Person, lots of angst then fluff
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-07-18
Updated: 2017-07-18
Packaged: 2018-12-03 17:42:16
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 625
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11537205
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ssilkenwolvess/pseuds/ssilkenwolvess
Summary: If there's one thing you've never been good at, it's understanding your emotions.





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**Author's Note:**

> listen yall can take the emotionally stunted hero hc from my cold dead hands

One thing some people don’t realize about you is  _ yes,  _ you can talk, and form complete sentences, and communicate just fine. You just… don’t really  _ want _ to, most of the time. Why bother, when Ruby was here, much better at communicating than you’ll ever be? She knows you better than anyone else, what you want to say, and she seems happy to take the lead in conversations while you listen, and you speak only when you need to.

(Sometimes, you wonder if she realizes that the only time you’ve decided it was important enough to give a long speech was in your last moments-- she knows you, but you had to make it clear just how much she meant to you, how happy you were that she found you on that beach, how much you loved her--

You hadn’t said that much even when they were in danger. Wonder what that says about you, and your priorities.)

* * *

 

Ruby is much better at emotions than you. She can cheer up people, be passionate about how she feels and you- Well, half the time you have no idea  _ what  _ you’re feeling. You confide this to her, one night, neither of you able to sleep even with the lulling noise of the waves and faint snoring.

“I guess.. that’s not really surprising, is it, when you think about it,” she replies, thoughtful, staring at you through the dim light of the moon. “We saw the paralyzed future. Everything was so dark and cold, it must have been hard to live there. Grovyle didn’t seem to be the best with emotions either, maybe that’s just how you have to be there?”

You don’t respond. You also don’t shake or feel melancholy from her mentioning the future or Grovyle, so you suppose that’s a success. Distantly, you wonder if that feeling is grief, but you’ve never been good at identifying your own emotions. Snuggling up against her, you curl up and pretend to go to sleep, although you never get much past a doze that night.

* * *

 

      You fall in love with Ruby long before you recognize the emotion. The trust, the pride, the pure happiness you feel being with her, wasn’t enough to tip you off. Even after you began remembering who you used to be, how you used to feel, you don’t realize.

      To be fair, though, you haven’t much experience with emotions. You’re intimately acquainted with fear, resignation, and an all consuming numbness. The closest you ever felt before to  _ this _ was with Grovyle and your family, and look where that had gotten you.

     You cared for Grovyle, you really did. He was everything to you, and you trusted him with your life. But after your family died… you couldn’t seem to make yourself feel much at all.

      It’s not until after the two of you graduate that you realize. The sunset is beautiful from the mouth of Dharpedo Bluff, and you lean against Ruby to soak up her warmth. She’s telling a story, one you’ve heard hundreds of times before, and you think  _ I could do this forever. _

     Her tale involves two pokemon falling in love and going off to adventure together afterwards. You’ve never been good at words, so you don’t know how to tell her. That this is the most content you feel in your life. That the future-past was awful and you miss Grovyle terribly, but you would do it all again to be with her. That you love her more than you ever thought you could ever feel again after you lost your family.

  
     The story lulls, and you curl your head into her shoulder. You’re bad at words, so all you can do is quietly whisper  _ “thank you for being my home.” _


End file.
